September 9, 2009
Tears come and tears go, just like the Ebb and flow nothing gained and nothing lost. Thoughts and feelings never to be lost. Allow yourself to feel the pain of unresolved emotions. These feelings arrive just close to the dates that you are meant to deal or feel the pain attached to the emotion. Yes it’s true, after my accident that stopped me in my tracks, reflecting on my own issues, emotions and self pity of my own pained body. The pain that yelled out saying, “deal with your feelings.” I know my Reiki Masters that I’m so blessed and grateful to have by me praying to speed up my healing with leaps of pride, amazed by the energy and vibrations of all the love and support that my body was receiving. I felt tremendous love and healing. The little discomfort that has arrived from this incident pestering me on my left side. Everyone keeps telling me it’s my heart chakra, “Meg you give so much love away you need to ask to be replenished at the end of the day.” My favorite girlfriend in the world Rena says, “Meg reach down and feel your heart, energy, the pain, the discomfort and send it the green that you see.” My shaman healer, Ron, suggested that emotions that may rise from my pained left side allow the tears to flow or any other emotion which may come, just release it.
Well that evening when I did go to bed September 6, 2009, I woke up telling my mother that I as so sorry that I had no choice, I had to dial 911 to get you into the hospital. I knew that you would receive better care then I could give you. At this moment they were holding up my brother Joey and Karen’s wedding at our property waiting for me to arrive. I rushed home and changed and went through the motions that Mom was safe and mom will be fine. Not wanting to ruin the wedding I put a smile on my face and didn’t let anything bother me.
Burying deeply the emotions that were haunting me seeing my mother slip away from me. My mom, my best friend, my eating partner (that was the joke she loved food and we loved to enjoy it together). My shopping partner which she always said, “Oh Meg, that looks great on you, just buy it.” The laughter and love that we shared so deeply. Humor that was so contagious people would bust a gut listening to both of us laughing all the time. Our attraction with people, places and things was very very magical. I remember a guy chasing us down the streets of Bermuda when we were heading to the airport saying, “he will miss us.” I was always amazed at the crazy things that we did and the fun that we had. There was never a dull moment, the stories are forever in my heart and they say Italians always have stories. Mom, being Polish the stories never ended. When I woke up the next morning I was amazed at what I had been holding onto, who would have known, truly. Your body is a refuge and dumping ground for good, bad, happy and sad. Emotions are like the oceans so vast and so deep. Never knowing the triggers that we put on them to rise a sensation that can set us off or just make us cry. If you feel emotions of any kind let them flow, you too will feel great. Just release let go and let god. It will lighten your load. It works!
As I reflect on this experience it is quite fascinating to me that this was my pained heart chakra, as I know in my heart that my mom’s passing day is coming up September 28, 2003, six years ago and it feels like yesterday to me. The gifts that we shared together are forever treasured. Words to reflect upon buried in our hearts.
Treasure them,
Share them,
Live,
Love,
Laugh
Oh yes, if you choose to, cry!
We all have choices to cope and deal with our feelings. Every one of us will pass through the gates to be with our loved ones. Here while on the earth plane, embrace your journey. Love Heals!
It’s all good, with love and gratitude,
Meg
